Monday, July 30, 2012

It's Only Korea...It's Only Korea...

I figure if I keep chanting that to myself it will make all of this easier.  Kevin flies out this weekend to Korea for a year.  This morning our doorbell rang and this is what I saw in front of my house.  UGH!  It makes it all real.  It's only Korea, right?  It's not Iraq or Afghanistan or someplace dangerous.  Yes, I've heard it all, I've said myself even.
We still feel strongly that this is where we are supposed to be in relationship to this separation, but it still sucks.  I usually try hard to be optimistic and try to keep things in perspective, but this is me being as real as it gets.  I am sad that I will have to say goodbye to my husband in just a few short days.
My heart broke when I read my 14 year old's status:  Well this is gonna be the last Sunday dinner with my dad before he leaves in Saturday to Korea for a year:...( I ♥ u dad.   Cue Tears.
This has been so much harder than I anticipated.  I find myself bickering with Kevin for no good reason.  Subconsciously I tend to push him away thinking that it will be easier to say goodbye.  It never is.
I know my kids are trying to prepare themselves too.  Daniel got up this morning and immediately asked where Kevin was.  I think he is so worried that Kevin will leave without saying goodbye.  Kevin has never done that but it's still a real fear for Daniel.  Michael hasn't said anything really.  That's really just his style.  He holds it all in.  It's hard for me to watch him deal with it silently and not push him.  
We will all be okay but it sucks.  That's what I'm saying today...separation sucks.


Julie Danielle said...

I'm sorry :( It is so hard to start a separation...even if it isn't to Iraq or Afghanistan. *hugs*

Sammy said...

It's only Korea but it still sucks to be without a husband. I love you Nadine!