I have been on a crazy, emotional roller-coaster for the past week. I've been up, I've been down. I've been hyper, I've been exhausted. I feel angry one minute, sad the next. It has been a very draining week. It is frustrating. Nothing terrible has happened this past week. It was a busy week, like normal. A bit busier with added doctor appointments and a sick kid but nothing I can't handle. Perhaps I've hit the milestone of getting past the first 60 days of Kevin being gone. The first "season" of activities we had to get through are almost over. Michael performed at the last football game of the season with the marching band. I was reminded that Kevin has missed the entire Marching Band season. Neil has his last football game tomorrow and Kevin has only see him suited up in pictures. Daniel had a great game yesterday and his team won and I got to send the victory message through Facebook.
For the most part I do okay on my own when it comes to the kids. I miss Kevin but I try hard not to make a big deal when it comes to him being gone. He's only in Korea. But the reality is, I miss him...a lot. Even though I can do all these things alone and I can find a balance, I want him here with me to share in the ups and the downs.
I have such a wonderful support system here, it's overwhelming at times. I am truly blessed with the people in my life who help me meet the needs of my kids. I know I'm not alone.
I guess there is no real point to this post. It probably makes no sense to anyone else but I will admit that it has helped me work through some emotions. It has allowed me to shed some tears that have been on the edge of spilling over. There is no real reason for them, except that every now and again, we all need a good cry.
I miss my husband and on most days I can keep those emotions in check, but sometimes they just catch up to me and I have to release.
We've made it through the first two months, only ten more to go. We can do this...